Discovering the Curve

The CBR is perfectly comfortable in a turn. As long as I keep my head turned and my eyes focused on the apex, the bike simply kneels over and flows toward the target. Riding a bike is different from driving a car in that there is a new discovery in every curve. A road can be ridden a thousand times and each time through would be different from the others. I wanted to ride so I can be faster than other people on the road. I wanted to ride so I can be more maneuverable than other people on the road. But what keeps me on the saddle is the experimentation and discovery of learning a new technique that I have never used before.

Bleeding the brake while snapping the bike from left to right feels amazing! One should not be able to do this; it's certainly not something that is taught in class. As I ride and experiment with the throttle or with the brake, I find that I can do more things than I previously thought. The building up of speed, along with the new management techniques that keeps my bike on its wheels, is frighteningly exciting. I know my limit, but sometimes I slightly push my limit. The result is pleasantly surprising. It feels like I have gotten away with something that I shouldn't have; and somehow I am special because of it.

In life, we search not for things that we can do very well, but for things that we have not done before. This is why I am in the profession that I am in. I do not simply want to be so good at what I do that I am untouchable. I want to learn and grow and discover. I want every minute, every breath to be a new experience. Sometimes fear grip me back. I realize that to be able to over come my fear while applying methods and techniques brings so much joy that it is indescribable.

I realize that this is why life is exciting in that you are not given every ability, every strength, and every bit of knowledge the day you are born. Every person has the chance to step forth and discover new things about the world or him/herself. This is the dynamic of life that can never be taken away. It is true that sometimes we suck and we crash horribly. But in most cases, with proper guidance, conditions, and intelligence, our bodies and minds can ride and flow like no super computer can.

Just last week, I had learned to plan and manage large undertakings. This involves a lot of guessing, estimating, arguing, and reguessing. The point is to take the most amount of BS out of the process as possible. This increases the chances of succeess, even to the point unimaginable. Lives can be saved, happiness could be attained, time and effort could be harvested, only if we use our imagination and management techniques. These techniques must be attained through the process of risk management, instinctive actions, and most importantly, the intelligence to discover what works and what does not.

As I ride through the curves and straights that I have done a hundred times before, and as I look back at the arduous undertakings that I was a part of, I can see that when we shut down the part of our brain that wants to discover and overcome that we truly fail. We simply have to go just a bit faster than we have gone before, and overcome the part within us that just wants to do things we have always done it, then we would be more successful than we have imagined before.

I find that the hunger for discovery feeds itself, but also yearns for more. When I think that I have mastered a technique, I simply wants to turn around and do it again. Maybe this time, I will learn a new technique. No time through the road is ever the same.

Motivation to Ride

I have my bike back, and with great sadness that I must report I have turned into a poser. The truth is I don't know quite what to do with this thing. It is my passion, and I never want to let go of it. However, I don't spend enough time with it to truly invest in the passion right now. I will plan out my riding objectives, and collect gear along the way-when they're affordable. I will either make it into a half-time track bike, or fully track it. It will all depend on how much traveling my career will demand of me.

I am entering a phase of "lack of motivation"-both to ride and to achieve. This is typical of an aftermath of a great marathon. I have struggled, I have been down, I have thrived, and I have learned. But now what? I don't see my exit, and hence I don't feel the commitment.

This time period is such a blind corner for me. I know I should keep the faith, and try to stay on throttle while leaning and maintaining speed. But I can't see the exit, and I can't hit the apex. This corner is tightening, and I'm questioning my speed commitment. When do I run out of lean angle, and when will I slide out from underneath? These are dangerous questions, because the more imminent danger is if I back off the throttle, and begin to wobble about. A high side is much more likely.

So, thinking about crashing is no way to ride, but it haunts me ever since the last bad action I've taken. I'm out of rhythm, and thinking more than I should. Hesitation infects my actions and it spreads throughout my veins. I know what to do-to turn on the music and twist that throttle harder, but I am facing mental blocks that I cannot overcome-that is to simply act.

If I weren't me right now, here is what I would tell myself: to simply accept that I will crash. This mental state has been written ever since the days of ancient Chinese war artists to philosophers of the Renaissance. "The soldier that wants to live in battle will die, and the soldier that knows he will die will live". Memento mori. Remember that you too will die. Each moment of hesitation, each of moment of fear, is a moment against personal achievement. To become who I have imagined myself to be, I have to accept that to a certain measure, I will fail. Again.

The trick is to simply process all the risks and fears into the logical part of the brain, and push all the feelings from them to the back. Not many people can or will operate in this environment, but those that do truly find their rewards.

This concept can only be proven in action and in the results from which. So, let the battle be joined. Let the bike the ridden. Let the consequences be damned (slightly). Let me attempt this once again, and see what comes from it.

Most importantly, let this be my motivation to ride, and nothing else.

Yesterday is gone

I sit in the corner with my helmet on. Where will I go? How will I grow? What part of this life I will experience? Will I survive? Will I thrive?

I'm going to live with the decisions that I make on the go. That's the way it is and that's all that there has to be. Everything else is just noise.

Snap into a turn

This blog is just going be about me releasing some stress.

I had just got off the phone with my coworkers in India. They're very nice people, and I bet they know more than I will ever do. Sometimes I get so involved in the process that I don't look around to enjoy the days and time that pass before me. But right now, I feel happy for some reason. I think of the things that I could do to make a difference in some people's lives.

I suddenly think of the sunny days that I was out on my bike. The feelings of being pinned into a turn. The adrenaline flow of twisting that throttle so hard, the earth seems to fly by underneath. The ride across the ridge as the sun glares in my helmet visor. The hang off from the seat of the bike as it makes a violent turn while avoiding running wide in a corner.

Sometimes things are happening so fast, you don't have enough time to react. These times are frightening and disturbing, but once your mind and body catches up to the speed, you realize that it is one of the best feeling ever. I am enjoying every minute of this. I wanted to do this. To ignore the risks and focus on some arbitrary end goal. I'm fixated, not on the turn, but the exit point. And everything else is just falling in line. The bike is going to where I am looking. Steering takes little effort, and rhythm takes precedent over process. Maybe something will blindside me, but chances are I will get through this okay. That is all that matters.

I am snapping life into a turn as if it was on a whim, and it feels great. In this environment, I am taking more and more risks, and finding their rewards.

Braking and Entering

As far as corners are concerned, one is never like any other, and every time I take a corner (even if it's the same corner), the feeling is different. The challenges in life, as I see them, are much the same way. However, there is a method to the madness. And to have fun, to truly enjoy doing it, and to survive it, I really believe someone needs think it through before they set out to achieve something.

In motorcycle riding and racing, this means hitting the brake well before you enter a corner, and to spot the nearest entry while braking. It means that once you lean her over and commit to it, it is all gas from there on. This requires experience in cornering, judgment in the environment of the road, and the determination to carry it through, no matter how much you have to lean.

I guess that is why I tend to think more before acting. I see people rushing to act, rushing to judgment, and rushing to get things done without knowing all the impacts. Seeing their failures, I begin to question my own method; and in this madness, I see the light of reasoning. It does not take much, but you realize something important, a breakthrough begins in your mind. I formulate a set of steps and rules to follow, to ensure that whatever happens, I will react the right way. Much of this process is based on other's recommendations and experiences, but it's the fact that I carry them out in my own way that makes it special.

This enables me to go faster and faster each time through a corner. This makes environment a factor in everything I do. This makes the whole thing seem right and effortless. For a moment in this process, mind and soul meets. This is where the thinking and feeling merge; where confidence and action go hand in hand. This mental state is always what I am trying to obtain at the very peak of solving a problem, and it requires thinking as well as doing.

Another lesson to learn from this is to get rid of any excess speed (baggage in personal life) before you start a new challenge. This requires the right mindset and also the knowledge to hit the brake hard when required.

I am now trying to hit the brake as hard as I can. I really don't know what the next corner will bring, so I am spotting my entry and make sure that my speed is right for it. I had love to take high speed blind corners, but one is different: I have been down before. Now, surviving is taking precedence over the excitement of the unknown. And will learn to have fun by beating my demons, not by giving in to them.

Trust me, it's paradise

When I wake up in the morning and finish preparing for my day, I get out to hop on my vehicle to get to work. Hitting that starter switch on the bike always feels different than turning the key in the ignition of the car. It's not just that the rumbling motor is right underneath my butt as opposed to being in front of me. It's that the presence and all its realities suddenly come together in a rush. I stop thinking about the distant future. I stop thinking about this time next year. I stop thinking about tomorrow. I stop thinking about what I will do at work.

I think about this moment. I think about now. The concentration of solving the challenge right in front of me is exciting and rejuvenating. Certainly, in my life, I have dreamed of great moments that would be sweeter than anything I have ever felt before. The temptation is, however, to get lost in those dreams and never get out. Being on the bike cures that syndrome.

When I look back at the pictures of people or myself, I really wonder if they (including me) really savored each and every moment that they were smiling with their friends. If they ever took risks and enjoyed the rewards that it brought. I wonder if people really felt those moments.

Why does this really all matter? Well, because all those moments are paradise. The moment doesn't have to be anything that no one has done before. It doesn't have to be well-publicized or well-known to the masses. Every single obscure moment that you can spend with your friends or quietly by yourself could be a paradise on its own.

That reminds me of a quote - "scars remind us that the past is real". I think we need to go out there and create more scars. It is to know that we truly have lived, and that our dreams led us to do good things. Things that when we look back, we may consider them part of paradise.

Being Invisible

Bikers, in general, are invisible on the roads and in the public policy making decisions. The last good decision that my state made about bikers was to allow them to use the carpool lane. Though this rule is not specific to Washington; it is nation-wide such that air-cooled machine would not break down in the middle of heavy traffic and it is safer for bikes to be on the move vs in stop-and-go situations.

On the road, I can't even start to count the numbers somebody invaded my lane leaving me wondering my own mortality while they just drive on as if nothing happened. We are invisible to everyone except ourselves.

This is a shame because bikers, in my eyes, represent the best in humanity. We are the risk takers, and we take risks at our expense. We always hope for the best but prepare for the worst. We reduce congestion on the road. The best quality has to be the fact that we all have one passion, and we love to share it with other no matter their background or situation. Anyone who puts one leg over the saddle can be my brethren.

Any time we form a group, or introduce a change to the public policies, we are seen more as a nuisance than anything positive. Is this a case of people being jealous, trapped in their own world and detesting anyone or anything that choose not to live by the same rules they do? Until policies change, and the truth be understood by the masses, we will always be chased by cops, looked down upon by other motorists, and portrayed as deviants in the media. Once in a while though, we can see the twinkle in a kid's eye when he sees us, and that makes all the difference in the world.